Well, I was back leading our worship at both services today.  After 4 days of feeling comparatively crappy (always full, no room for water, often slightly nauseous and often a bit light headed) I felt a bit better this morning.  Which is not to say I felt good.  But I felt good enough.  And it was wonderful to be back with the St. George’s community.  I was absolutely exhausted when I was done (and actually left before the coffee hour was over).

But I’d gotten a decent start on liquids while I was there.  And I was able to add about a cup and a half of broth and a cup of a half of water when I got home in (using a post gastric bypass timeframe) pretty quick order.  And I felt much better after that.  I couldn’t even nap.  So eventually I got up and walked about a mile.  Have not been nauseous or light headed since the liquids went down.  So I feel, at the moment, not comparatively good, but quite good indeed.

Last night Anne and I did a bit of a test run.  We went out and saw Bill Engvall at Arco Arena.  We did not buy tickets in advance — in part because I wasn’t really sure I’d feel up to going.  But I felt up to at least getting in the car when it was time to go.  And I felt good enough when we arrived that I quite enjoyed myself.  And we ended up with great seats:  three rows back from the rail above the floor seats.

I’m not quite sure why I didn’t feel so well the last four days.  Maybe the new water pill?  Maybe the daily asprin?  My temporary blindness in my left eye is still likely caused by a new migraine variant, not a mini stroke.  But I think I’m on the asprin until my doctor takes me off.  And I do have to talk to one doctor about the results of the ultrasound of the carotid arteries.  It may well be nothing.  But I know it’s not completely normal.  Because he said he wouldn’t be talking to me about the results if they were completely normal.  And he’s called me in to talk to him about the results Tuesday.  And then Wednesday I have a non contrast MRI of my brain.  And then we are presumably all done with the tests about this incident.

My blood pressure has been good since the water pill was added.  But my blood sugars are still high — even after adding back the second of my three diabetes medications (both at full strength).  I’m not sure what’s going on.  I am scrupulously following my diet plan.  I do know that I have a history of my blood sugar going up overnight (with no food intake after early evening).  As I recall, that’s how I ended up on the Actos — the only medication I was taking I’m still not taking.  So I’m a bit frustrated on the diabetes front.

But I have to say:  I’ve done very well so far in spite of all my little complaints (and the worry about the blindness incident in my eye).  That was true even these last four days when I was feeling comparatively crappy.  I’m healing well.  I’m exercising.  I’m back at work.  I’m driving.  I’m eating real food (even if it pretty much is all pureed).  I know I will be somewhat frustrated if I don’t eventually have a better result with the diabetes.  But it was and is a pretty good bet that I would have/will have good results.  And even if it does not pan out, it was a good decision to try this.

Meanwhile, I’ve lost about 25 pounds since the surgery (three weeks tomorrow) — sixty pounds since I started “qualifying” for the surgery about a year ago January.  I’m down two pants sizes since the surgery (and Anne is starting to bring me just a few new pants — so far two pair from Goodwill and one pair I haven’t tried on yet purchased retail on sale earlier this afternoon).  I’m going to need a new belt.  I can see the weight loss in my face even just since the surgery.  I still think I probably could have lost all this weight (much more slowly) without the surgery.  And I know I’m unlikely to be svelt.  Heck!  I wasn’t svelt when I weighed 148 pounds back in seminary.  So realistically the chances are almost non existant.  And my best read is that I will be doing very well indeed if I can get down to maybe 200 pounds and stay there over the next five years.  That would be lighter than I ever remember being since I was ordained.  I’m kind of counting on getting (and staying) under 220.

Meanwhile, I keep having to think about new things.  Can I eat the bread at communion?  And if so, should it be the little pieces of real bread, or should it be the fish food wafers?  To really stay properly hydrated, should I keep drinking out of some kind of water bottle throughout both services?  Did I remember to bring the protein “shake” for my between meals snack?  (And how much of it am I actually going to be able to drink on a Sunday morning?)  Does my backpack more weight than I should be carrying yet?  How am I going to feed myself Wednesday (when I have an MRI and a funeral downtown in the morning, and a doctor’s appointment downtown about mid afternoon, so I don’t really want to go home in between) and Thursday (when I have an all day meeting of Diocesan Council downtown) and am really “gone” pretty much all day, both days, for the first time?

So:  I’m in the healing curve still, and I’m in the learning and adapting curve still.  But I’m feeling good about the choice to have this gastric bypass surgery.  And I’m feeling good.  And I’m doing well.  And I’ve started moving forward with the new life that now lies before me.  I’ve gotta see what’s on my post surgery “bucket” list that I can do now — or maybe even have already done!

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